Elon Musk Wins Citizen of the Year Award
“He’s had such a positive impact on so many people,” said an awards committee member.
By Luce Widafax, National Correspondent
Washington, DC – August 29, 2025
Federal employee unions have named Elon Musk “Citizen of the Year” for his “selfless, empathic, and philanthropic contributions to American society.” Musk spent $290 million on charitable causes in 2024-2025.
"I know it sounds crazy," Musk said outside a newly constructed homeless shelter, "but I realized I could use my billions to stop human suffering rather than bankrolling America’s authoritarian takeover—or working weekends to fire emergency management workers and cancel cancer research.”
Musk, the world’s richest man with a net worth of $421 billion, planned to spend 0.07% of that supporting Donald Trump and right-wing candidates in the 2024 election cycle. Instead, he set up and endowed The Department of Government Empathy (DOGE), which has provided support to:
22,650 homeless individuals who have supportive housing for a year
66,200 food-insecure Americans now receiving three meals daily
145,000 uninsured people for access to basic healthcare
11,600 students attending college on full scholarships
“At first, I planned to replace Medicaid with a government contract for one of my new companies — ImmizR8 — where the poor could subscribe to poverty relief for $25 a month. I also planned a tweetstorm about how hunger builds character,” Musk said.
“But Grok convinced me that not every investment needs to be self-serving. After I housed the entire DC homeless population and bankrolled their social services, President Trump didn’t even need the National Guard anymore!”
Reforming Government
In addition to helping America’s most vulnerable, Musk’s award citation praised the humility and selflessness with which he helped the Trump Administration make government more effective and efficient:
“With no prior experience in government, Musk regularly consulted experts and employees about how things work and why to collaborate on reforming their agencies. He then oversaw a well-considered and systematic process for streamlining and reorganizing federal organizations and processes that retained key talent and removed low performers.”
“I expected to be fired,” said Maria Martinez, a Department of Interior employee. “Instead, DOGE cut red tape, upgraded my tech, and introduced KPIs to hold me accountable for serving the public. I can’t watch General Hospital all day anymore while leeching off taxpayer funded benefits and coasting into retirement! I’m turning in my Model S.”
Musk’s thoughtful approach to government reform has put him at odds with Trump.
“Like a Tesla on autopilot, Elon was supposed to wreck the federal government and remake it as a loyalty rewards program and cash cow,” said President Trump. “Human decency and competence weren’t part of the deal. Elon, you’re fired.”
Musk’s Next Philanthropic Endeavor
After falling out with Trump, Musk reportedly planned to spend hundreds of millions starting his own political party and funding super PACs, so that he could further enrich himself by manipulating the political system.
At the award ceremony, however, Musk surprised everyone by announcing plans to acquire a major pharmaceutical company and turn it into a non-profit that would provide life-saving medications at drastically reduced prices.
"They were overcharging people for things that keep them alive," Musk said. "Wild."
“Just as I reinvented the car, space travel, financial payments, and satellite internet access, we’re going to remake healthcare – like I made Twitter a bastion of respectful discourse and reliable information.”