White House Releases Iran War Rationale Desk Calendar
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By Rip Diplomacy, Foreign Affairs Correspondent
Washington, DC — Tired of answering questions about its constantly evolving rationale for bombing Iran, the White House has released a 365-day desk calendar, allowing reporters to peel off a fresh explanation each morning.
Officials confirmed the calendar does not contain a planner.
“Now the media can stop asking us why we’re bombing Iran and simply check today’s square,” said Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt, demonstrating the tear-away format. “We believe in transparency.”
Asked whether the calendar suggested the administration was preparing for another year of war, Leavitt replied:
“Of course not! But maybe. Possibly, yes. This shouldn’t take more than four weeks. After that, it’s open-ended. We won’t commit troops, but the President isn’t afraid of boots-on-the-ground. We remain open to negotiate Iran’s unconditional surrender.”
She added that the administration is also developing “Iran War Motivation GPT…
